Exciting news! You have recently acquired a fabulous kitchen device called the garbage disposal. Amazing in that if you cook something, you just throw the scraps in there, hit a button and BAM—it’s gone! You save space in your trash can, the landfill, and get to take out some latent aggression on your produce.

But there are things you should never put in the garbage disposal. Save yourself the pain of throwing down money for a plumber with the following tips:

The DO-NOTs – Things you should NOT put down your garbage disposal:

• Your Hand. In my opinion there were two awesome scenes from Season 1 of Heroes: When Claire (who can heal herself for those of you who haven’t seen it) walks out of the burning house charred from the nuclear explosion and when she sticks her hand down the garbage disposal to fetch a ring only to pull it up all mangled and bloody—showcasing EXACTLY why YOU should NOT stick your hand down a garbage disposal. It is a motorized rotating blade. Even if it is off—DO NOT RISK IT. One accidental flip of the wrong switch and…

• Grease / Oil may be a liquid but it never should be poured down any drain. Why? Because as it cools, grease coagulates, and can clog your pipes

• Rice & Pasta are natural desiccants. That’s the fancy word I learned from CBS’s Elementary that means they draw water from their environment and expand. While this is a great way to save your iPhone after you’ve dropped it in a pitcher of beer—pouring rice and/or pasta down your drain or garbage disposal will allow them to continue to collect water, expand, stick together, and guess what? Clog your pipes.

• Starchy Veggies such as potatoes, broccoli, and other fiberful family members can also draw water and their long, tough, stringy fibers can tangle and jam the blades.

• Egg Shells seem like a good candidate for a garbage disposal but don’t be fooled. The shells are coated with a tough membrane that can weave a web between the blades. Instead, consider throwing them into a garden or compost pile.

• Bones & Fruit Pits will not meet defeat in the garbage disposal. These kitchen leftovers are simply too strong to be processed and can break the disposal’s blade. Be sure to dispose of them in a careful manner, keeping them out of reach of children and pets that could choke on them.

• Shot Glasses, Plastics, Glass and Paper go in the recycling and not in the garbage disposal. This one should be obvious, despite what the UE Editor-in-Chief may think (Editor’s Note: I claim no knowledge of this, nor have I ever done this…if this had occurred, however, it was by pure and total accident, and ended very badly for everyone, particularly the garbage disposal.) Shot glasses and other broken household objects should never go in your garbage disposal because they will BREAK it.

The jury is still out…

• Coffee Grounds are tough—there are two schools of thought: Some sources say that the grounds are greats for cleaning out your drain and freshening up odors. Others say they can stick and clog up the drains. I think it’s probably best to avoid putting these babies down the disposal and looking into some of these alternative re-uses for coffee grounds.

The DOs – Things you should put down your garbage disposal:

• Lemon, Lime and other Citrus peels throw a couple of these peels down the drain and you’ll have a cleaner, better smelling garbage disposal in no time. One of the reason you find citrus fruits in so many household-cleaning products is that they are cleansing and non-corrosive. Citrus juice can even strip dirt from under your fingernails without much effort at all. (Think about that next time you order water with lemon.)

• Ice, Ice, Baby. (Sorry, couldn’t stop myself.) Crunching large amounts of ice, and a bit of vinegar, in your garbage disposal will help sharpen and clean its blades.

Pro Tip: Is it hot and sticky in the summer? Is your home prone to fruit flies and other winged visitors? If you’re having trouble getting rid of them it’s probably because they are living in your sink drains. Kill them and prevent them from coming back by pouring large amounts of ice over your drain. This makes it too cold for them to lay eggs and survive.

Now that you’re an expert garbage disposal user—feel free to grind away!